DISORDER Part II

After Monday's evaluation, I left feeling sad, confused and a bit overwhelmed.  I wrote my last blog in that blur of emotion and was glad for the freedom to do so.  I am also glad for those of you who commented and even for those who exhorted me out of my fear.  I am sure of God's overwhelming goodness and His ability to work good things in and through this tough but all so common trial.


Today, Jon and I were able to meet with the therapist who evaluated Kyle and though I was warned that stiff drinks might be a necessity afterwards, I left feeling so much hope.  The behavior in Kyle that I have had trouble explaining away as normal for a boy his age now makes so much more sense.  My frustrations with him for reacting a certain way will undoubtedly decrease as I have better explanations for his behavior than sheer disobedience or stubborn willfulness.


My hope is that these therapy sessions will increase not only his mental organization skills but also his ability to be free in his spirit.  He is only 4 after all.  We, as his parents, see the internal struggle and how quickly he moves to frustration and up until now, we too became frustrated.  Now we understand that the frustration can be helped and even prevented but not through the methods we were formerly using.  He was born with genetic components that make it difficult for his mind to make order out of chaos.  For example, the therapist said he may prefer individual sports over team sports not because he won't have the mind to understand the sport, but because he may struggle to synthesize the information of each of the team members positions and needs as well as his own all at the same time.  I can see this.  He will also like enjoy using his intellect as a default strength in order to avoid the other areas that are more of a struggle. We hope that working on things now will enable him to be more balanced.


Jon and I are glad for the opportunity to focus on this now and to give Kyle the attention he needs.  We are so thankful for the knowledge out there and for answers to the questions that didn't seem to be satiated with, "he's just a boy".  I am grateful that there is science behind this and help for us.  I am excited to join with him in the journey of discovery and understanding.  


We are of course still eager for news, though we know it's a long way off, of a baby for us in Rwanda, but I am grateful for God's timing in this and that He is providing us the ability to focus on Kyle before she arrives.


The fog is clearing and though I know there is a journey of hard work ahead, I am grateful for direction in it.